nobodyknows
I’m gay
Queer couple Jay and Vol’demar find strength and community in Kyiv’s underground rave scene — where dance becomes both survival and resistance in the face of war.
TO DANCE IS TO RESIST follows Jay and Vol’demar, a queer couple and professional dancers whose lives unfold within Kyiv’s underground scene — a fragile sanctuary of freedom amid Russia’s full-scale invasion. As air raid sirens interrupt the night, they turn to dance studios, clubs, and stages as places of refuge, transforming movement into an act of resistance.
With intimate access, the film captures their daily lives: tender moments at home during blackouts, rehearsals where bodies carry and release trauma, and raves that pulse with both joy and danger. The challenges during the war are constant, yet their courage shows in the decision to keep creating, to keep loving, and to hold their community close.
Structured as a poetic, non-linear journey, the film blends vérité with performance, archival fragments, and immersive cinematography that mirrors the emotional landscape of its protagonists: a cathartic processing of the war through art — while a textured sound world transmits the pulse of Kyiv’s heartbeat to audiences beyond Ukraine’s borders.










Jay is a dynamic Ukrainian performer, dancer, actor, and model from Kyiv. With a career that began in choreography and expanded to include over 50 music videos, Jay now performs with Freedom Ballet and leads the visual department at UkrainePride. Together with Vol’demar, they co-founded the XXX performance and Community Motion studio, creating a unique artistic family deeply integrated into Kyiv’s queer rave scenes. Jay’s artistic endeavors are a testament to the resilience and vibrancy of Ukraine’s LGBTQI+ community.
Born in Svetlodarsk, Donetsk Oblast, Vol’demar is a professional dancer, stylist, and performer with extensive experience in dance battles and stage performances. As a movement director and physical coach, Vol’demar aims to reintegrate waacking into club culture and promote Ukrainian queer art. Alongside Jay, he uses his art to challenge norms, navigate socio-political complexities, and foster acceptance within and beyond Ukraine. Vol’demar is also a teacher of English and dance at Ukrainian schools, where he acts as a role model for future generations.
“I’ve lived alongside them, filmed their most intimate moments, and stood with them through air raids, rehearsals, and personal struggles.”
As a queer artist and filmmaker who has immersed myself in Ukraine’s underground scene for years, I’ve developed profound connections with the people whose stories exist beyond simplistic headlines. TO DANCE IS TO RESIST emerged from my relationship with Kyiv’s queer creative community — particularly Jay and Vol’demar, two dancers whose courage and vulnerability have deeply moved me. This film documents not only their resilience but also reflects my own journey navigating queerness, trauma, and resistance through art. It embodies my commitment to amplifying marginalized voices and my belief that storytelling can be transformative in advancing social justice.
My goal has always been to make something that feels honest and alive — experimental in form, but grounded in care, connection, and the belief that personal stories can carry real political weight.
— Julian Lautenbacher, Director
Starring
Jay LaRêve
Vol’demar Kabus
Featuring
XXX Performance
With
Anita Tor
Sasha Moon Elf
Ya Maha
Stacy
Periashvili Kateryna
Dina More
Dasha Malikova
A Film by
Julian Lautenbacher
Written by
Julian Lautenbacher
Nadiia Khatymlianska
Sasha Ongley
Cinematography
Ganna Garbuz
Julian Lautenbacher
Edited by
Nadiia Khatymlianska
Digital Colorist
Asa Fox
Produced by
PM Film Production
In Association with
DIM Film
Producers
Julian Lautenbacher
Sasha Ongley
Co-Producers
Birgit Gernböck
Eric Holland
Assistant Producer
Aleksandra Popravko
Original Music by
Francesco Leali
Julian Lautenbacher
With Music from
Benoit Charest
Sylvain Chomet
Black Devil Disco Club
Sassy Sally
Sound Design
Julian Lautenbacher
Oleg Kulchytskyi
Yegor Irodov
Foley Artist
Yegor Irodov
Sound Post Production
Studio Q Berlin
Verzaska Dolby Atmos Studio
Makeup Artist
Sophia Konstanchuk
Makeup Artist & Hairstylist
Svitlana Drozdova
Costume Design
A.V. Marille
Tasha Labunskaya
Marchenko Oleksandra
Photography
Diana Aleksandrova
Viktoria Rudenko
Impact Producer
Sarūnas Kirdeikis
Social Media Producer
Pascal Bauer
Impact Campaign Assistant
Ali Morgan Winiesdorffer
Event Coordinator
Olo Gil
Berlin · Pride Month Special
Join us for a special Pride Month screening of TO DANCE IS TO RESIST at the Yorck Kino Passage in Berlin-Neukölln — followed by a live Q&A with director Julian Lautenbacher.
Doors 19:30 · screening 20:00. Free seating — please arrive early to get a good seat.
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A capsule of “nobody knows I’m gay” pieces — wear the film, support its release. Printed on demand and shipped worldwide; proceeds support the festival run and impact campaign.
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